Enter - the crowded service bar after a long 4 day weekend at Le Passage. It's Monday morning at 4:15 am...the shift ended 15 minutes ago and started at 9:30pm Sunday (even earlier if you came in to decorate for the Memorial Day celebration.) Long story short, it was a crazy week for us and now we were done...having a cocktail together and sharing the war stories of our week. Laughter fills the room of people and a high-five is delivered between co-workers. Then another, and another. Someone turns to one of the new security guys with their hand up and extended in the high-five position and he looks at the person like she's stupid. "I don't do high-fives" he says. Immediately the room grows uncomfortable and quite. (Kind of funny to witness 1st hand...you would have thought a racial slur came out of his mouth or something!) Out of respect for the fired, I'll call him "new guy". He couldn't get over himself or his little smug attitude enough to give a stupid high-five! Yep...that's right...I fired someone for not giving out high-fives. "Joel you are such a jerk!! Why would you do that??". I'll explain.
At Le Passage, we have cultivated a family. A lot of blood, sweat and tears goes into maintaining a family, both a true blood family and one that is built with people you respect and love...on where work ethic is strong and focused TOGETHER on the shift.
Back to the new guy...
I'm very receptive to people and their pasts. I understand feeling like you are on an island by yourself because their is so much camaraderie that it makes you feel weird or out of place. I also know that you have to keep your eyes open to your environment and how TO or NOT TO be part of it. I mean, hell, if I hadn't made a conscious effort to leave my neighborhood and the shadyness that I could have gotten myself wrapped up in, I'd be dead or in jail right now...true story. It's my opinion that it is AS important to know what to gravitate TOWARD as it is to know what to separate yourself from. Make sense? Turning your back on evil is only half of it...you have to know when to walk towards the good.
Aside from the non-high-fiver that he was, over the 3 days that he worked here he never decided to be part of the team. Do I think that is his fault? No. I just made the decision that in the mean time while he's out there on an island, shit can go down. I run a nightclub. If I don't know 100% that each of my guys can and will do everything in their power to keep our guests and staff safe then I can no longer work with that person. If you "don't do high-fives" then what else don't you do because you take yourself so seriously? We aren't security...we are hosts. We don't elevate the problem...we pro actively prevent them. We tell people thank you for coming because we appreciate that without them, we would be nothing. At the end of the story, I think "new guy" will put that hand up and probably over zealously smack the next high-five hand he sees.
As far as the sacrifice for family goes, sometimes you have to step outside of the situation and observe it for more than it is on that given day or week or month or year. To date, the biggest sacrifice that I have made becoming the General Manager of Le Passage has been the time that I have sacrificed with my little girl.
NO EXAGGERATION - for the 1st 18 months of her life, I had Hannah 6 days a week in the morning and worked 6 days a week at night. My schedule was literally nutz! During the 1st stage of being a daddy, I was bartending /managing a bar in wicker park. I would get out at 2 or 3 and have Hannah at 6:30am every morning. I got to sleep on Tuesday mornings because Hannah's Mommy (Melissa) worked at night on Tuesdays. I had my little angel a lot of the time then. That was very important to me. I was there for her 1st words, her first steps, 1st diaper BLOW OUTS, her 1st roll over, sit up...you name it...I was there. We couldn't afford daycare at the time but even if we could, I would have rathered sleep for 3 hours a night and catch a nap in between Daddy duty and work in order to be there.
I didn't expect to be the GM of LP...I was walking down the street 3 months after I had quit my job because of my principles (a story that I will happily share with my daughter one day). My phone rings and it is the assistant General Manager of LP at the time asking me if I can work in 2 hours. I had walked about a mile and a half south of my house for 2 reasons. 1) walking is free...I was so broke that I was beginning to wonder if my morals had gotten in the way of me providing for my little girl...I was sad. And 2) I had nothing better to do on a Saturday night.When I get the call, I realized that I didn't have enough $ to catch a cab back to my house so I ran home. Showered, shaved, grabbed my bar bag and caught the bus to work. I got there at 9:02pm. Officially the 1st and only time I have ever been late for my 1st day on the job. Long story short, the next week I had another shift, 2 weeks later I had 2 shifts, 3 weeks later I got the busy bar, a month after that they asked me to be the head bartender and about 3 months after that they asked me to be the GM. It's funny how fate works...my first exposure to a nightclub was Le Passage and it was also my first nightclub bartending job. Le Passage is also where I met the mother of my child. Who knew that 5 years later, I'd be back as the GM? As good as I feel about that story, I knew that accepting my current job would be a huge sacrifice of my time. Sounds crazy, right? We're open 3 nights a week but I work damn near every day...a lot goes into creating, maintaining and executing a great party every week people. It's taken a lot to get people to believe in me as their leader but even more so as their equal. I tell people all the time that we work together...no one works FOR me...only WITH me. I believe that what I am doing, even though I now only have 2 MAYBE 3 days with my daughter, is the right thing. Looking to her future I see school, clothes, toys, shotguns (for me and her crazy uncles), cars, college, a wedding and grand children. It's a well-known fact that full-time tip-based employees (bartenders, servers, etc) make more money than most industry manager! If you divide the amount of hours a week that we work, there is NO ONE that gets paid as low as the managers! Lol! But that's ooooooooookay...I feel like this was the best move for me to grow into a better business man and provider for Hannah. I know that I made the right decision. I am growing. The business is growing by the week. The buzz is growing. All I want is for people to know that I was associated with it...there's plenty of credit to be distributed amongst my team...my family.
I really didn't know that this blog was going to go like this...I can't help it, nor do I want to. My mommy always tells me that if you share what God has blessed you with and it reaches ONE person then you have done well. Hey...I'm a competitor!! I want to reach at least 2 peeps! Lol! Bye!
Sacrifice is good IF it's for a reason...sacrifice is GREAT if it's for family. - Joel D. Barnes
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Friday, May 22, 2009
5.23.09 - My first 1st blog
So, the idea of writing a blog has been rolling around in my head for. some time now. I recently reached out to my friends on Twitter and Facebook to help me name the collection of my writings. The message asked what I should name a blog that essentially is about being the father of a little girl and running a nightclub at the same time. "Day and Night...It's All About Her" (Thanks Dan!) Obviously, there are so many things that conflict with what I do but much to my surprise, there are a great deal of things that go hand-in-hand about it as well!
I want to write about the conflicts, the struggles, the lessons I've learned, the family that I have grown, the ugly side of my business, the beautiful way it unites people and how I got to the place in my life that allows me to step back, observe it all and influence lives. Last part sound silly? Wonder how I influence lives in the nightclub business? The short answer...I drive a business. It provides for everyone from the owners to the dishwashers. Everyone needs money to live, right? My #1 goal at Le Passage is to make something so great that it provides for all those that rely on me.
If my motivations are so righteous than why write about it? I want something that's mine, all mine! What better than my story? What better way to talk to my little girl who can't understand me now but one day will. People will always ask or question my motivation and I'm okay with that...As long as Hannah Marie never does.
Also, I've always know that there would be a day that I wrote. I've tried to journal before and it hasn't worked very well. I need an audience. The concept is the same because writing provides a type of therapy to the writer. It allows one to be alone with their thoughts, reflect on them and in essence develop themselves. I think it's crucial that I develop as a person and this is the first time in my life that I have decided to focus on that. Lol...at the end of the day, if I make myself better I can make the world better. If I make the world better, it's a better place for my little girl...and your little girl or boy...and their kids. I think I'm in this world to make it better and I will.
Not what you thought this blog would be about so far?? Lol...me either! I just started writing and that's what came out.
Something tells me that if you are looking to read something shallow, this may not be the blog for you. :) I'll let you know what's awesome at Le Passage, or who came in, or what event we have coming up etc. I'll also let you know HONESTLY if the celeb that came in is an ass, or if they were cool or if things don't go quite the way we anticipated. I'll be the real Joel David Barnes. ALWAYS.
If you see my tweets or facebook status updates, you know that I send a lot of messages about my little girl. Since the goal of this blog is to highlight both being a father to her and being the General Manager of Le Passage, I will make sure to include a story about Hannah each time I write. Here's the first one:
Whenever I'm with Hannah we try to get out of the house and go for walks around my neighborhood. Even when it was chilly we would bundle up and at least go to the store around the corner. There is an old Asian woman that walks around my neighborhood and I have seen her for years. She always walks with her head down towards the ground and walks so slowly. I've lived on the north side (Irving Park and Lakeshore) since I moved to Chicago 9 years ago. I've been in my current apartment for 6 years and I have seen her since then. Long story short, I've never seen this woman's eyes...until recently. I was on a walk with Hannah and we approached the woman coming toward us. Hannah like a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day...she penetrates your soul with goodness and purity. Sure enough, this sad old woman walked slowly toward us and my little angel simply looks up at her and says "Hiiii". This woman didn't know what hit her! It was like a light switch flipped on. That woman smiled SO big and said "hi" back and giggled and stared at my little girl. She smiled so deeply that it had to go as far as her heart! Hannah was 18 months old...this woman, probably 70...Hannah knew 20 words in English and this woman may have know 5...but they communicated. I still smile about that story...
That's what I got for my first blog...hope you like it and will read again. I want this to be a vehicle that I use to grow my knowledge, grow my business and grow my wisdom. PLEASE feel free to comment! I will read them!
Joel David Barnes
Daddy to Hannah Marie Barnes
General Manager to Le Passage
I want to write about the conflicts, the struggles, the lessons I've learned, the family that I have grown, the ugly side of my business, the beautiful way it unites people and how I got to the place in my life that allows me to step back, observe it all and influence lives. Last part sound silly? Wonder how I influence lives in the nightclub business? The short answer...I drive a business. It provides for everyone from the owners to the dishwashers. Everyone needs money to live, right? My #1 goal at Le Passage is to make something so great that it provides for all those that rely on me.
If my motivations are so righteous than why write about it? I want something that's mine, all mine! What better than my story? What better way to talk to my little girl who can't understand me now but one day will. People will always ask or question my motivation and I'm okay with that...As long as Hannah Marie never does.
Also, I've always know that there would be a day that I wrote. I've tried to journal before and it hasn't worked very well. I need an audience. The concept is the same because writing provides a type of therapy to the writer. It allows one to be alone with their thoughts, reflect on them and in essence develop themselves. I think it's crucial that I develop as a person and this is the first time in my life that I have decided to focus on that. Lol...at the end of the day, if I make myself better I can make the world better. If I make the world better, it's a better place for my little girl...and your little girl or boy...and their kids. I think I'm in this world to make it better and I will.
Not what you thought this blog would be about so far?? Lol...me either! I just started writing and that's what came out.
Something tells me that if you are looking to read something shallow, this may not be the blog for you. :) I'll let you know what's awesome at Le Passage, or who came in, or what event we have coming up etc. I'll also let you know HONESTLY if the celeb that came in is an ass, or if they were cool or if things don't go quite the way we anticipated. I'll be the real Joel David Barnes. ALWAYS.
If you see my tweets or facebook status updates, you know that I send a lot of messages about my little girl. Since the goal of this blog is to highlight both being a father to her and being the General Manager of Le Passage, I will make sure to include a story about Hannah each time I write. Here's the first one:
Whenever I'm with Hannah we try to get out of the house and go for walks around my neighborhood. Even when it was chilly we would bundle up and at least go to the store around the corner. There is an old Asian woman that walks around my neighborhood and I have seen her for years. She always walks with her head down towards the ground and walks so slowly. I've lived on the north side (Irving Park and Lakeshore) since I moved to Chicago 9 years ago. I've been in my current apartment for 6 years and I have seen her since then. Long story short, I've never seen this woman's eyes...until recently. I was on a walk with Hannah and we approached the woman coming toward us. Hannah like a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day...she penetrates your soul with goodness and purity. Sure enough, this sad old woman walked slowly toward us and my little angel simply looks up at her and says "Hiiii". This woman didn't know what hit her! It was like a light switch flipped on. That woman smiled SO big and said "hi" back and giggled and stared at my little girl. She smiled so deeply that it had to go as far as her heart! Hannah was 18 months old...this woman, probably 70...Hannah knew 20 words in English and this woman may have know 5...but they communicated. I still smile about that story...
That's what I got for my first blog...hope you like it and will read again. I want this to be a vehicle that I use to grow my knowledge, grow my business and grow my wisdom. PLEASE feel free to comment! I will read them!
Joel David Barnes
Daddy to Hannah Marie Barnes
General Manager to Le Passage
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